Assignment Demotivational Poster
PARANOIA - I'm telling you, man, he's planning something... The way he just sits and stares, doesn't even blink... Damn goldfish freaks me out, man...
DEADPOOL - His secret ingredient is love. ~ Just kidding, it's napalm.
PEEK AT'CHU - And your nephew. Every night. EVERY night.
OVER-COMPENSATING - NO! I'm not!
BEER - I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day
COUCH POTATOES - It's true hard work never killed anybody, but I figure, why take the chance?
JUST REMEMBER... - No matter where you go, there you are!
THE HANGOVER -
HERE LIES MR. SMARTASS -
BLASPHEMY - GOOD FOR ONE TICKET TO HELL -
VERNE TROYER - Excels at miniature golf... Has improved his short game... Doesn't have to take a knee to read the greens... Climbs out of sand traps... I COULD DO THIS ALL DAY LONG.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! - May the coming year be as bountiful for you as this one was for Death, Grim [email protected], and... Hey, who's the new guy?
MOTIFAKERS PARADISE -
HOLIDAY DECORATIONS -
A DAY IN MAY -
REVENGE - BEST SERVED COLD? Perhaps. But MUCH tastier hot and steaming.
KILLER WHALES - Not all who fish are above the water.
WHITE BREAD -
POOR LETTER Q - Even though U and I always hang out without him, he's the one that gets stuck with the tab.
BOXING DAY -
WHEN PIGS FLY -
PSYCHOLOGY - Psychiatrists! All they do is tell you you love your MOTHER!..... than goose you for $500 Dollars.
LIFE IS NOT -
REAL MEN DON'T CRY - However, in 1992 you were allowed to throw up in your mouth a little.
IT'S OVER - I haven't seen a "REAR NAKED CHOKE" like that since the "UFC FALL BRAWL!!"
TOW-IN EXTREME SURFING - The use of a helicopter for "TOW-IN" surfing started to appear in the mid 2000s.
COMPLACENCY - Never underestimate the power of putting off till tomorrow something you could have done today.
GRAY HAIRS - Sometimes it is better to have traitors than deserters.
SOMETIMES... - there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it. Like my heart's going to cave in. - American Beauty (1999)
ABJECT FEAR -
MIXED METAPHORS - Never beat a dead horse in the mouth.
GERMANS - Such big babies about that whole war thing.
YEE-HAW!!! - Giddyup, little wiener-doggie! Hah! Time to round up all the tiny livestock! Ride 'em, crabboy!
BAD JOKE -
WHAT?! - I said THIS IS CORNY! You forgot to rinse out my can, you douche!
MERRY MOTIFAKIN' CHRISTMAS -
GRAND THEFT DREIDEL -
HAPPY HOLLANDAISE! - From: Jimbo (not pictured), Jimbo Jr. (not pictured), Shelly (not pictured), Tina (not pictured), Uncle Ricky (not pictured) and Bertha.
POWER GIRL AUDITIONS - You're doing it wr...ight? S-s-s-sorry, LaKeisha. We'll call you....'ll call us. Got it.
HORROR MOVIES, WHY THEY DON'T CALL FOR HELP -
OH, NO!!! - I don't like this part, it's too scary! Just tell me when it's safe to look, okay?
JUGGALOS - The Timmys of the real world.
BUT I COULD BE WRONG -
THE ETERNAL QUESTION -
ELVES - They're masters of sarcasm.
TUNA FISH CASSEROLE -
NOTHING SAFE - No matter how awful something was, somebody somewhere will eventually make a sick joke out of it.
EXTREMES - Among redheaded step-children, most males aren't loved enough, but most females are probably loved too much
WRATH - Inevitable when you go about denying yourself the other 6.
GOOD BAD -
GRAND SLAM -
Genetic Counseling -
BREAKING UP - YEAH WE'LL BREAK IT UP FOR YOU.
GOLDEN YEARS -
HOLIDAY FAMILY GATHERINGS -
LUCK - If it wasn't for BAD LUCK I wouldn't have any luck at all.
SUSPICION - One of you smiling bitches poisoned this and I'm not happy about it...
ECONOMIC DEPRESSION -
AL BUNDY - really hates fairy godmothers
EFFICIENCY - In these days of stress and have-to's, there is no time for both dinner AND dessert.
LISA'S 18TH BIRTHDAY -
AWKWARDNESS - Well if it isn't good ol' Tigger! You really thought you could steal from me, leave Disneyland, and start a family in Wyoming, huh? Where's my honey, Tig? I want my damn honey.
"FUNNY" MOUNTIES - Here, here! You oughtn't do a thing like that. It's not the Canadian way. Eh?
THANKS, SEAN!!! - I always wondered where canadian bacon came from.
WTF? - Is zat cop holding a SILVER PHAZER GUN? Well Rock-n-Roll! Put that puppy on full-auto lets see what it can do!
ROYALE-TEA - You know what they call the drink that comes with a Quarter Pounder meal in France?
JESUS - He's one of a kind, all right...
EVIL - EEEEEVVVVIIIIIILLLLL
I'LL PASS - said the other kid wearing a yellow shirt
MY ONLY REGRET - I didn't get divorced earlier. I didn't get a better lawyer. I didn't meet the woman pictured above... Ok my top 10 regrets are....
CONFUSION - Muhammad's followers depicted him for hundreds of years, why should I worry about being decapitated for this?
SADOMASOCHISM - When you start the vicious cycle of arguing with Timmys, you are only punishing yourself.
PRESSURE - You have to kill a whole brigade of alien ships with just one patriot missile system. Lucky for you the alien attack plan was something they came up with from probing Timmy.
LET'S RECAP - Not ONE of you thought, "Hey, maybe I'll bring a gun just in case."?
THE FUTURE - All Hail our Robot Overlords!
HISTORY IS WRITTEN BY VICTORS -
THE LADIES OF MOTIFAKE - They may be young, but they know where you live. Erecrottod.
BILL GATES - He's rich.
LUCK - THIS IS HOW you make your own.
DISTRACTIONS - Teaching my son to read at such an early age used to make me proud. But now I have a hideous flip-down DVD player in my Ford Focus because I want to drive to Costco in peace.
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